Minerva's Hit List
by Gibsos
Summary: Minerva and Dumbledore oversee detention together after Minerva's gone on a detention-giving streak. Bonus chapter pending.


Title: Minerva's Hit List

Summary: Minerva and Dumbledore oversee detention together after Minerva's gone on a detention-giving streak.

Character: Minerva McGonagall

Word Count: 1,414

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**A/N - Send me prompts!**

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A tall, stern-looking witch with black hair drawn into neat finger curls (as usual) walked into detention. Few students dared cross her. The younger students found her to be quite imposing and rumours were spreading that she had eyes in the back of her head. How else could she spot trouble a mile away?

Minerva McGonagall, shoe-in for the position of Head Girl next year, took her seat in the front of the room amongst the other delinquents. She sat straight backed and tight lipped as ever and gazed disapprovingly upon Albus Dumbledore as he oversaw detention from his desk at the front of the room.

Professor Dumbledore just smiled back serenely, pretending as though he had no idea what problem Minerva had with him, and as if he wasn't deriving great amusement from the reaction the _rest_ of the classroom had to Minerva's entrance. But all he said to her was, "Miss McGonagall, welcome. You're helping me grade my first year's tests; you can take an answer key and a stack of papers from the front of the room."

In the _back_ of the room exactly one Gryffindor and three Slytherins were glaring at the back of Minerva's head. Each had been landed there by Minerva McGonagall, all for the friendship of first year Hufflepuff Pomona Sprout.

Bartemius Crouch, the Gryffindor, was the start of the trail. All she had to do to find him was go down to the common room. "I know we don't get along with the Slytherins Minerva, but I hardly think it's necessary to start a _blood feud_ over some silly little Hufflepuff girl."

"And you're going into Magical Law Enforcement," Minerva scoffed. "I feel safer already. _Three_ Slytherins jumped a first year Hufflepuff girl, Crouch. Who are they?"

Crouch gave her a small resentful look and walked off, "Let it go Minerva."

It wasn't difficult to land Crouch in detention. All she had to do was bust their homework ring. Each person did homework for one subject then passed them around, Crouch's idea of course. They just made a few superficial changes in phrasing and teachers were none the wiser. Not too scandalous but good enough for a detention.

Her next lead was Martha Greengrass. Minerva managed to waylay her on the way out of Defense Against the Dark Arts. The Slytherin girl knew _all_ of the best gossip.

"Martha," Minerva greeted.

"Minerva! And _why_ would you be looking for me?" she grinned.

"Do you know which Slytherins beat up Pomona Sprout?"

She snorted, "Of course I do. But what do I get for telling you?"

Minerva scrutinized her. "Help with transfiguration," she offered brusquely.

The grin widened, "Oh, no, Minerva. You can be useful to me, even if you are a total pill. I'm reserving the right to call in a favour later."

Minerva frowned, lips thinning almost imperceptibly. "Fine. Who did it?"

Martha's pleased expression was sickening as she leaned forward and told Minerva, in hushed tones, "Abraxas Malfoy, Cantankerous Nott, and Walburga Black."

"Thank you," Minerva replied sternly.

"Abyssinia, Minerva," Martha called after her as she walked away. "And remember, I'll be collecting that favour."

Cantankerous Nott was easy of course. He had a fascination with _pointy things_. Minerva caught him without even expecting to on a five-minutes-to-curfew trip to the kitchens. She walked in as he was standing around knocking things over and terrorizing the house elves with one of their knives.

Walburga Black was far subtler than Nott, which said a lot about _him_ since it was quite common to catch Walburga screaming things at people down the hallway. Minerva half expected to find her threatening the house elves as well. And, credit where credit is due, she _was_ around the house elves when Minerva found her.

She was skulking around the laundry room, kicking house elves out of the way and putting itching powder on some of the clothes. Minerva was later informed that they were the clothes belonging to muggle born kids.

She snuck up behind her as she riffled through a pile of laundry. "It's after hours Walburga, you should be in your common room," she said coolly. Not a hair moved out of place on her perfectly coiffed and cutting edge hairstyle as her head whipped around.

"McGonagall," she hissed back, "You really think you can order me around?" Walburga looked Minerva up and down and scoffed, nose crinkling derisively at her plainer hair and distinct lack of makeup. "I don't take orders from some little muggle-daddy's girl."

Minerva fixed her with her sternest, most burning look and responded, "I think you'll find the teachers will disagree however. I'll inform them in the morning and they'll assign your detention." Then she turned on her heel and strode out of the room, only poking her head back into the room to tell one of the house elves, "Don't let her touch anymore of the clothes. The ones she's gotten to already will need to be cleaned."

"Of course, miss."

Abraxas Malfoy was a little more difficult… To get to him she had to deal with Howard Goyle first. Abraxas would never dirty his own hands as long as his bodyguard was around. The trouble was that simply giving Howard detention wasn't going to put a stop to him; she was going to have to put him out of commission. Semi permanently.

She saw her chance during Herbology as Betty Abbott chattered on beside her. "He's being such a greaseball! Can you believe he won't even let me call him Iggy anymore!?"

"No way…" For the first time Minerva was glad they had Herbology class with the Slytherins. Her current focus was Howard Goyle's black dragon hide gloves. To use a vanishing charm or to transfigure them was the question…

"Yeah! Apparently he's _Ignatius_ now. And he's going after _Lucretia Black._ Lucretia Black of all people! She's almost as bad as Walburga… I mean I knew he was weird but I didn't know he was such a crumb! Maybe it's just for the money. I can see him being a grifter, but who would marry one of the Black girls?!"

A switching spell would work. Simple, anyone could do it; provided they had passed first year transfiguration of course. Only what to switch it with? The plan was to make the switch just as he went to grab the bubotuber so that the pus gave him boils all over his hands.

"He was surly all summer…"

"So your visit to the Prewett's went well?" Minerva asked vacantly.

"Haven't you been listening?! Iggy was mean to me the whole time. I don't know why. I've been staying over the summer for years, ever since I started dating Louis, you know? He never had a problem with me before."

As Betty pouted Minerva lined up the shot, spotting a small leaf on the ground. No one noticed the tiny leaf that landed on Goyle's hand as he screamed and yanked his hand away from the pus covered plant. The leaf fluttered to the ground as Goyle's gloves landed on the ground outside with a small thud, unseen by everyone.

Minerva allowed herself a small secret smile as Goyle ran out of the greenhouse and into the castle. "Mr. Malfoy, see to it that Mr. Goyle gets to the hospital wing," Professor Beery ordered.

With Malfoy's bodyguard out of the way it was easy to catch him getting his hands dirty. He had made rather a _habit_ of picking on first years. Usually he could stand back and let Goyle do the heavy work, and then take the detention, but not this time. Luckily the transfiguration teacher Professor Dumbledore just _happened_ to be walking by to give the detention. After all, Minerva couldn't give detention to a fellow prefect, and Malfoy had managed to buy his way into the position somehow.

Everything was going perfectly according to plan. She could hear Malfoys outraged arguing from inside the classroom.

Afterwards Professor Dumbledore approached Minerva in the hall where she was lurking; waiting to make sure he got his detention.

"Thank you for the tip Minerva," he greeted. Minerva just nodded and started to walk away. "You wouldn't mind joining us, I'm sure?"

Minerva looked back in confusion. "Why would I need to join you?"

"Curious that Mr. Goyle's gloves should disappear just as you needed to get back at Mr. Malfoy, isn't it?" Professor Dumbledore smiled as Minerva stormed away, eyes twinkling as always.

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A/N - She had to be a student once, right? This should take place at about 1935 so I looked up popular baby names in the 1920's and 1930's slang for this.

Not sure if people know this but info on what I'm writing can be found on my profile, but most importantly **send me prompts!** The Endurance Challenge was cancelled but I want to keep going. This was a prompt a friend gave me but other than this one they've been pretty useless, so I need people reading this to help out! Send me a message, or leave it in a review. You can even specify a character for the prompt and I'll try and do it!

This was a lot of fun! Looking up all the slang and stuff. If I can think of a favour for Martha Greengrass to ask of Minerva this will definitely get another chapter.

In the 1930's "messy-cute" hair wasn't a thing, which I figure is where grownup McGonagall gets her hair styling habits from. Everything is always in place! Also remember, she was a jock! She played quidditch, she couldn't have been as straight-laced as she was in the books!

Unfortunately McGonagall era doesn't seem to be an accepted time frame to put this in. Guess she's not as popular as the founders!


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